It can be frustrating for TKIDs and other Rapture fans to not know when, exactly, some of us are going to be beamed-up to heaven during the Second Coming. (For the uninitiated, a growing movement of millions of Americans holds that end of the world is fast approaching, and that they will soon be instantly teleported up to heaven, leaving the nonbelievers to be ravaged by plagues of locusts, frogs and rapacious gnomes.) To that end, I did a little digging and found a handy Rapture Index, which tracks "prophetic activity" to predict just how close we're getting to the end of the party. The index, which is based on 45 bible-approved categories, currently sits at 151. According to the website, if prophetic activity pushes the index anywhere over 145, it's time to "fasten your seatbelts." That's right, the end is almost here.
The high number on the index is due to several categories that are currently in play, such as the "Beast Government" category, which has been bumped-up due to the EU's recent moves toward legitimacy. Apparently the Euros get the Beast tag for, if nothing else, being Euros. However, other categories are cooling off of late, such as the "Liberalism" meter. With a spanking in the recent elections, liberals are on the wane. In describing why liberals' lame belief system is part of the Rapture watch, the site says: "It's not just a part of the democratic party. Liberalism is what I would call the 'true conspiracy.' The liberal media is 100 percent control [sic] by the forces that bow to this humanistic ideology."
Right on, this kid says.
On a related note, liberal journalist Bill Moyers recently wrote on how the rapture crowd is getting involved in environmental politics. Apparently rapturites believe that environmentalists are in the employ of the Beast, the thinking being that the Big Guy ordained that the Earth is ours to trash as we please, and the sooner we funk it up, the sooner we get zapped to heaven.
This idea is comforting to TKID4, who loves to throw his empty High Life bottles on the ground whenever he traipses around our national parks. How can one enjoy nature, I wonder, without exercising his right to litter? By the way, my tax dollars built those mountains and other assorted natural treasures.
